Empathic Etiquette

Empathic Etiquette

This is a set of loose guidelines compiled by the members of House Sovyn and written up by Lady Viria, dealing with empathic etiquette. These are not rules set in stone, but they are a summary of the general feelings on empath etiquette in our day and age. 

Claiming a healing spot as your own

While it is all right to sit in an area and heal, it is generally considered unacceptable to "claim" an area for yourself and prohibit anyone else from healing there. This is inconsiderate to your fellow empaths, and possibly to the wishes of the people you are healing. However, if you wish to set up a "healing ward" in your home, well, its your home. It is also considered polite for you to greet other empaths when you enter a room with the intent to heal; this lets them know you are there and is a friendly gesture. 

Asking before healing

It is the accepted practice to wait until a person asks for healing before healing them. It is also acceptable to ask the person if they want healing before healing them. This is a good way to be polite, and also make sure the person wants healing. It also lets other empaths know that you will be healing a certain person, so you don't bump heads meditating in the same small space. This can also reduce conflicts between you and the injured person, as well as you and other empaths. 

Respecting other empaths

Respect is very important in the empath profession. We depend on each other for clean ups, moral support and more importantly, friendship. Healing someone that has asked another empath to heal them is usually considered rude; both to the injured person and the other empath, and will likely cause one or both to become upset. It is also polite to clean up an empath when they ask for it, if at all possible. If you can't give a clean up right away because you're healing yourself or already busy with a patient, tell them you'll get to them as soon as you can. Communication is very important. If you are healing in a room where you feel another empath is acting unprofessionally, talk to them quietly about it, to let them know how you feel. Most of the time they don't realize they're offending anyone, and will stop if asked. If you're healing in a place where dead bodies are often fogged in, make sure you always ask before healing a corpse that has been fogged in. This is a sore spot for many empaths, they spend lots of mana and time rescuing this person, and they should be allowed to finish healing them; so try to remember always to check. 

Respecting other people's rights

It is important that you also respect the rights of your patients. If someone does not wish to be healed, then do not heal them. They may be keeping the wounds as trophies, for skinning or they may only want to be healed by someone they know. It is their choice. If you choose to disregard this, they will most likely be angry. In some circumstances, empaths feel they can personally not let someone die, so they will heal them even if they don't want to be healed. The empath must realize that the person will probably be upset, as is their right. 

Healing a person who doesn't want to be healed

When you heal a person who specifically asks not to be healed, you're disrespecting that person's rights, plain and simple. If you intend to heal them anyway, because you morally cannot watch someone die, then you will have to deal with the consequences. Empaths never have the right to heal anyone; we are given a gift and can use that gift when it is needed and wanted, but we cannot force it on others. If the person is not dying, but has an aversion to empaths, prefers to use herbs, or wants to only be healed by a certain person, you also must respect that. This is common courtesy, and you can always offer aid in some other way, such as bandaging or giving them herbs. 

Invasion healing

Anyone who's healed during an invasion knows how hectic it is. For this reason many consider invasions "off-times" for most etiquette, but you should still try to integrate it. You should still try to respect other empaths, and the patients as much as possible. It is generally not considered prime time for socializing, as more noise than necessary is usually not welcome, but communicating can save lives. Keep a flask handy in case the clerics overlook someone. Keep herbs handy because you're very likely to run out of mana, and if you are able to keep an amulet on do so; it might help to know when a horde of critters is about to barge into the place you're healing at. 

When you can't get that last wound

When you're healing someone, and you cannot finish healing them because you are too young, or too full of wounds, it is generally polite to explain to them you can't finish, but you are asking another to help them; and then to request that another nearby empath finish healing them. At the very least, inform them that you can't finish healing them, so that they can find another empath on their own. 

Clean ups

When another empath asks for a clean up, it is polite to oblige them as soon as possible, or let them know that you can't at the moment. When asking for a clean up, remember that other empaths may be wounded, or already seeing to a patient. It is also easier during hectic times to get a clean up of the head and nerves rather than a full body clean up. When asking for a clean up, make sure the wounds you are having taken are minors. Be sure to take back all your wounds, and don't leave the other empath waiting with them. Also, when you want your nerves cleaned up, make sure you have no missing blood. If you have missing blood, another empath might transfer it, and die. This is also true of people cleaning up another person. 

Interacting with your patients

This is vitally important to being an empath. Many empaths have their own unique "style" of healing, this adds to everyone's life. If you treat the people you heal in a special way, you'll likely make a lot of friends. If a person says thank you, respond to it. If they give you a tip, react to it. Do not just sit there like moss on a log. The more responsive you are the more people will want to be around you, and unless you're a hermit, this is a good thing. Diagnosing is a great way to show your patient that you're a person and not a healing machine. It also is a very important skill that we have. Appraising is another useful skill, but the person you're appraising cannot tell you're doing it. 

Healing the dead

When healing, you should usually treat the dead as you would with the living. Ask or wait to be asked before healing, and do not heal them if they are being attended by another empath. Often the person who rescued the person is a healer, and will already be helping them. When dealing with the dead, always make sure they are life-kept (it is smart to always keep a white flask with you), and try to contact a cleric if one has not already been called. Many empaths falsely think their responsibility to the body ends when they have finished healing it, this is not so. If it is all possible, we need to make sure the person is resurrected as well. 

Healing from place to place

In some areas, the empaths have their own rules and system of healing. This is usually for a reason, and when you're healing there, you should respect the wishes of the regular empaths. However, proper etiquette should always be maintained, even if its not a specific rule in the area you're at. We all know that there are areas like Town Square Central where it is always very busy, and a large number of empaths don't follow etiquette. This doesn't mean that you should abandon your own etiquette just because the other empaths are. If you find that you cannot heal correctly in a certain area, move somewhere quieter. There are many, many places where people go for healing; if you can't find any on your own, ask around. Usually proper etiquette is practiced much better in areas with fewer empaths, or areas where the empaths have agreed on certain rules enforcing etiquette. 

Sovyn-Specific Rules

Sovyn's charter makes the rules on how we heal a bit more strict. Our charter states we must heal every person who asks us, or make sure the person is healed. We must stop to help any deceased person if they are not already being helped. We cannot blacklist (refuse to heal people because of something they did to us or people we know, and encourage others to do so as well). If we refuse to heal or help someone we will be investigated and can be expelled from the House, especially if it happens more than once or twice.